What in the world is a “Crunch Mom”?

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A what? Crunchy mom? Like she cooks a lot of crunchy food? When I first heard the term, that’s exactly what went through my head. So I googled it. The next 15 minutes ere consumed with a mixture of laughter from what I read and moments of complete awe that clothe diapers were a thing. Gross. Here’s what I learned from my professional research:

Urban dictionary informed me that a crunchy mom is  “A member of an increasingly growing group of moms who are neo-hippies. Here’s a SHORT list of some of the characteristics of a mom with some crunch:

“Supports homebirth,  exclusively breastfeeding (#EBF for social media purposes), baby wearing, cloth diapering, co-sleeping, gentle discipline, etc.  One who questions established medical authority; tends to be vegetarian and/or prepare all-organic foods”

It was very apparent from reading that I was no where near a crunchy mom. Sure I still breast feed, but I’m no #ebf’er. I delivered my baby in a hospital and made sure to get that epidural as soon as the offer was on the table. I use pampers and will probably feed my kid Mac n’ cheese at least once twice a week. I admire any woman who makes sound decisions for her family, but these are not ones I made for mine. So if I’m not a crunchy, then what am I? A soggy mom? A deep fried Oreo mom? Well when you put it that way, maybe I want to be more crunch? Can I be 50/50?

Well, turns out you can be! As my research continued, I discovered two new labels of mom life.

A silk mama is “Modern mother who prefers medicated hospital birth, bottle feeding/part time breastfeeding, disposable diapers, crib sleeping, etc.  One who follows the advice of established medical authority; often tend to be working moms who rely on modern products for convenience and time management.”

A Scrunchy mama is “A mom that is a mixture of both a silky and crunchy mom.  One who may formula feed, and vaccinate as well as hospital birth but may use cloth diapers and make their own baby food”
As ridiculous as it seems, over the next few days I just couldn’t get the question out of my head. What kind of mom as I? I was having flash backs of all the “bad things” I had done so far that would probably make a crunchy mom cringe. I used gas drops at one point for my baby for crying out loud. If you aren’t crunch, then are you lesser of a mom?  What’s wrong with my disposable diapers? Should I google it? I never thought of making my own baby food- I could probably do that! The whole topic swirled around every decision I made for the next week.

Then I remembered a sermon I heard last Mother’s Day that seemed to really put my mom-worries at ease. Do you know the single word that is the most similar across the most languages in the world? Mom. Mom in Croatian- mama. Bengali- mā. Italian- mamma. Filipino- mom. I know this because I speak all those languages. Take that crunch moms. Shout out to google translate.

Anyways, my point I’m trying to make is being a mom has a universal understanding. You’re the person your kid is going to run to if they fall and scrape their knee. And to be honest they won’t care if you soothe it was 100% pure organic, animal cruelty free coconut oil or good ol’ fashioned neosporin. You are their caretaker. I can almost 100% guarantee you that you occupy just as much of their heart whether you store their food in glass containers or plastic. And just for the record, if your kid is still pooping themselves, they won’t know the difference if it’s happening in a clothe or store bought diaper. So you’re a crunch mom- is that a good mom? YES. You’re not s crunch mom? Wonderful. You’re the best version of a mom that you can be and that’s all your kids need from you. So keep mommin’ on. It ain’t easy but you’re doing a great job.

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Parenthood

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